Wedding Sunflowers

Everything changes.  It is inevitable.

If you are miserable and want your life to change, do one of two things:

1)   Be patient and wait for it to change

2)   Take some action to get the ball rolling, so change comes sooner

This is a very important lesson.  Please take it to heart and share it with others.

I wish someone had looked me in the eye and told it to me when I was 14 and deeply depressed.  Luckily I came through that time in my life and things got a bit better…..but I recall that in my darkest days, my most pervasive thought was: “Life will always be this way”.

That is where despair comes from.  The thought that “not only am I in hell, but this hell will go on forever”.

If you look back on your life, you will see that things didn’t really stay that way forever.  Maybe we got older, went to a different school, discovered a passion, moved out of the house, ended or started relationships, travelled, changed jobs…..

…sometimes we were the catalyst, and sometimes the changes came on their own.

If you are currently miserable about something…..ask yourself: “Can I be patient enough until the change comes?  Or are there steps (large or small)  I can take now to get the ball rolling?”

You might have to seek out someone for help.  That is okay.

As long as they can help move you in a new direction that is positive, joyful and will encourage growth.

Do not enlist a friend to “help” if that help will involve a 3 day bender in Las Vegas where you lose all of your money.  That is not necessarily the kind of change that you need.  No matter how exciting it may be at the time, it may only result in a new level of “miserable”.

If you don’t want to be where you are now, figure out where you want to be instead.  See if you can think of some baby steps to get you closer to that scenario.

If your situation seems truly inescapable, do some research…..there has surely been at least one other human being who has been in your situation, suffered the same pain or illness or physical ailment.  Find out who they are.  If they wrote a book, read it.  If they lead a support group, join.  If they are speaking out, go listen.  If there is a way to communicate with them, try and do so.  There is strength….and hope….in others.

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